Divorce can bring out the worst in people. Individuals who previously loved and supported each other may use underhanded tactics to manipulate each other and may even lie in the hopes of gaining an advantage during the divorce.
Couples may fight so bitterly as they prepare to divorce that they do permanent damage to their relationship with one another. While that may not seem like a major issue for those who can fully sever their connections after the divorce, it can be a serious concern for parents who have minor children together.
Many parents preparing for divorce choose to undergo mediation as a way of resolving divorce matters. Why do so many parents with young children turn to divorce mediation to resolve their disagreements?
A desire to limit conflict
Left to their own devices, divorcing spouses may get into screaming matches and sling insults at one another over perceived failures during the marriage. Unfortunately, when they have children with each other, those conflicts may have young witnesses. The more conflict children witness, the more damaging the divorce may be for them in the long run.
Parents who attend mediation have to cooperate with one another. They have to discuss their disagreements and find a way to compromise. That process can help them limit divorce conflicts. In fact, mediation can help divorcing couples re-establish healthy communication methods and learn to view one another as co-parents.
A need to discuss personal details
The terms set in divorce often reflect unique family circumstances. From substance abuse to domestic violence, there are many complex situations couples may need to explore at length to reach a fair divorce outcome. That can be especially true when people have to address custody matters, not just property division. A confidential mediation session provides an opportunity to discuss concerns about behavior that could endanger the children.
A wish for more control
When couples don’t agree on the terms of a divorce, a judge takes over the process. In a contested or litigated divorce, a family law judge learns about family circumstances and decides what they think might be fair. Couples effectively give up their control over custody and property division matters when they litigate in family court. By resolving matters amicably in mediation, divorcing spouses can set their own terms for everything from the division of parenting time to who stays in the family home.
Many parents choose divorce mediation over divorce litigation out of concern for their children. Learning more about alternatives to litigated divorce can be beneficial for those hoping to limit the negative impact divorce might have on their kids.