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Are you experiencing a power struggle during your divorce?

On Behalf of | Sep 16, 2021 | Mediation |

It’s not uncommon for couples going through a divorce in Wisconsin to feel they have no control. Often, one spouse may believe there is a power struggle throughout the process. This can happen when the marriage is not an equal partnership and one spouse makes unreasonable demands.

What is a power struggle in a marriage?

Marriage is meant to be an equal partnership between two people. Even when the couple has their differences, they are meant to be equals. When a marriage is healthy, the two parties will work together to make their relationship work and do whatever they can to provide for and love their children.

Although all couples have disagreements, a healthy one will make compromises to come to a conclusion that works for both people. However, if one spouse has too much control or is unwilling to compromise, it means there’s a power struggle. This is often more common during a divorce once the couple has decided to call it quits on their marriage. In a power struggle, one party may insist on getting their way and will force it on the other person.

What can lead to a power struggle during a divorce?

Many aspects can play a part in a power struggle during a divorce. The most common include the following:

• Money: Money is one of the biggest reasons behind a power struggle when a couple is divorcing. It usually occurs when one spouse is earning a lot more money than the other or if one works and the other stays at home to care for the children.
• Children: Sometimes, the children having a better relationship with one parent versus the other can lead to a power struggle. The favored parent will exploit the kids being more loyal to them to the other.
• Disengagement: If one spouse has been pulling away from the marriage, they would have power over the other, especially if the other spouse wants to save the marriage.
• Aggressive personality, abuse, or addiction: A spouse who has a more aggressive, dominant personality can exert their power over the other spouse. This also often occurs when there is abuse or addiction to alcohol or drugs in the relationship and the other person may simply agree to avoid a conflict or out of fear.

What can help when there’s a power struggle?

Even when a couple is in the divorce process, the issue of a power struggle should not be present. Compromising to reach a fair agreement over matters like property division, child custody, and alimony is important. As a result, if there is a power struggle, a mediator might be able to help resolve it. The neutral third party can help the spouse with too much power to see why they need to give a little and how it can help during and after the divorce.

It’s difficult enough to go through a divorce, but it can be even harder with a power struggle. Working through this issue can help everyone.