Divorce in Wisconsin can be a difficult process, especially when children are involved. For couples going through divorce with children, minimizing the harm to the kids and making the transition as smooth as possible is a high priority.
“Nesting” refers to a plan for handling child custody and parenting time during the transitional period while the divorce is in process. In a nesting plan, the parents and children remain in the same household, with the parents dividing up tasks and responsibilities via a pre-arranged agreement, minimizing the need for direct contact while keeping the household as undisturbed for the children as possible.
Nesting can be a great way to shelter children from some of the upheaval caused by divorce, but there are some pitfalls to watch out for.
Common issues with nesting plans
One of the most common problems a couple will encounter while nesting is continued fighting. The problems that led to the divorce as still present and oftentimes very raw, and being in proximity to your partner can lead to arguments and conflict.
Another common issue is couples not sharing information about their children’s schedule and lives within the division of duties, leading to mistakes and problems due to miscommunication.
Finally, sharing a household can increase the temptation for one party to remove items from the house before the divorce is finalized.
How to deal with nesting issues
Minimizing these issues largely comes down to developing a strong, clear plan at the onset and having the discipline to follow it.
If face-to-face contact is likely to lead to fighting, make all communication online or through text. To avoid miscommunication, create checklists and a process by which one party informs the other of relevant information needed to plan the children’s welfare. And it’s also important to make a written commitment to leaving all personal items within the house until the divorce is resolved.
Nesting can be an excellent way to minimize disruption for your children during a divorce. But it can also lead to issues, and creating an airtight nesting plan at the beginning is key to avoiding those problems.